talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
I'm twenty-five. I'm too old to be watching my friend throw up in Chipolte Parking lot.
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
We stole your phone last night, texted your brother and told him you wanted it up the ass by him. All he said was "I want ur money."
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I heard about the break up and if you need a place to stay my vagina is open for you 24/7
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I'm six Popsicles away from an existential breakdown.
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
Randomize
