no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
I just kept screaming "I'm fucking a preacher's son!" Also, this water tastes like weed.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
Shut up. You had me at killer robots. Your place or mine?
He walked in on me masturbating and on my phone but got mad because I wasn't watching porn just tweeting
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
Randomize
