CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Randomize
