We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
DONT TALK SHIT ABOUT LUNCHABLES
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
My saturday night consisted of sewing my Halloween costume and watching Blues Clues
You actually...sewed your costume?
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
Randomize
