She'll never know what hit her
I dunno. Girls tend to recognize ball-to-chin contact.
Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
I realized we pick a president more often than I get a blowjob
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
it was just another one of those moments where you unfriendzone a friend you assumed to be gay
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Randomize
