dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw
by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I imagine I kinda look like a banana with one boob out.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
Nothing says "forever alone" like receiving a friendship bracelet from your parents.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
If sleeping with your boss doesnt scream job security i dont know what does.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
