maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
We found her on a strangers doorstep chanting "I know someone will let me in" it took 2 of us to drag her to the car.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
Peeling duct tape off of my dick is definitely one of the stranger sensations that I've experienced.
I've just never heard the term serendipitous used to describe having one's asshole licked.
I appreciate the fact that you sent me a snapchat of your dick soaking in a cup of water.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
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