So you maybe wanna hang out again? I could use the $5
Whatever I can do to help stimulate the economy
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
Don't worry we didnt bang. Sometimes I just bring guys home so I don't order pizza.
Eating Doritos is not nearly as enjoyable when I'm not drunkenly feeding them to peacocks.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I'm laying outside on my patio attempting to get sun with a puke bucket next to me... This is dedication to the tan my friend
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
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