didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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