We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
I just sold my mom a dimebag. Should I feel scared or sucessful?
dad just smoked me out. he's yelling at room service for not giving him cookies and milk with his towels...we're both too high to know if thats a legit complaint.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
My hands always smell like pizza crust when im hungover.
The nausea has returned and I can't handle such things to exit my body so violently
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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