Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
I'm standing in line at the liquor store and they're making popcorn.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
