you mean i was at the winter classic?
Seriously, let me lead the intervention, my parents did like three with me. I know how it works.
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
walmarts paint section shouldnt be open at 3am
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
Today's weekday brunch started at 2pm, and consisted of $7 of sandwich and $50 of cocktails. Also, I hustled the bartender for about $3 playing nickel poker, but he may have been letting me win. Either way, he didn't get into my pants.
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
In my defense I didn't know there was concrete on the other side of that fence when I tossed him over it.
You're both fucking idiots and this is why I should never let you two drink alone.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
