so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
It was laundry day and I was wearing last xmas undies. he took one look and went...you's a ho, ho, ho. my response you ask? for less dough, dough, dough. I'm a slut.
with a sacreligious after taste.
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
My desire to pee is a lot higher than my need to be buzzed right now.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
I fucked the midget version of a backstreet boy and I am not mad about it
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