Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
I'm going out with a guy whose nickname is Shark Week cause he'll eat anyone. I'm very excited.
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
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