p.s. this guy just tipped me with ecstasy pills. is this real life
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
You fought the bouncer and lost, then challenged a hobo to a 40 chugging contest and lost. Sobriety is a good life choice.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
So your best guy friend eats your pussy once and a while, no big deal. It's like going to jiffy lube once and a while to let the professionals do it. Your husband should understand .
Tell me about it I woke up on your couch with only my underwear on and a 26 year old wrapped around me. I thought my thirties would be different.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
you're right. a strip only looks good in porn . mine just looks like a fucked up mullet
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
passed out on bart again and decide to bike home. biked thru a goat farm of angry goats, biked on the freeway, got stopped by the cops, and sat shotgun in the squad car while the officer driving got a video on his iphone of his partner riding my bike on the freeway.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
Randomize
