The maid of honor just puked.
thats the only time ive ever had sloppy firsts
My professor just suggested making the state of the union more interesting by turning it into a drinking game. Brilliant!!
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Don't worry, nothing happened....but we should have a fire extinguisher here.
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I haven't gotten it in awhile but since spring break is next week I'm willing to have a pregnancy scare if it means no bleeding through the suit
Yeah wouldn't want it to interfere with beach sex. Nothing should interfere with beach sex
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
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