Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Sundresses, hats, and big glasses. That is the greatest trick the devil ever taught women.
Seriously. Destroy her vagina. Do it like an angry baboon mating with a gentle manatee.
dude i woke up to her making a statue of my morning wood for her sculpture class. HOW THE FUCK do you think i feel about her?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
Still dying that you shit outside
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
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