I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
My RA just tried to write me up for having sex too loudly during quiet hours.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
Im otw to class. I was at the Library. Just past three girls with a bottle of tequila playing dizzy bat.
Putting a breathalyzer in a bar is a horrible idea. But I won
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
When you say shenanigans does that mean I should bring birth control?
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
Randomize
