this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
Might as well permanently tattoo lush somewhere on my body and show it to people when I decide to drink so they won't serve me.
He just walked from his house to mine. Walked in and asked for a hug and then left.. And he's sober.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Here's the "to do" list i just found on my phone: buy stripper pole, make sex playlist, buy febreeze
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
