I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
New favorite drinking game: bobbing for jello shots. Where did these freshmen come from and when can we go there?
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
Had a grope session with a girl who looked like my Mom and had the same name as her as well. I think therapy is in order.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Do they sell "congrats in losing your virginity!" cards and do they come in gay?
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
