So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Thursdays are my worst days
but now we sippin champagne when we thirstay?
By the grace of god and the ingenuity of Alexander Graham Bell, this text message is made possibe: YOU ARE A WHORE
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
They asked me to help them shop for lingerie.
Tell them everything looks awful, makes their ass look fat, etc. You'll wreck their self esteem and likely both have sex with you to make themselves feel better.
You're the most understanding sister I could ever ask for.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Randomize
