I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
He got me coffee AND filled up my gas tank. He must've fucked another girl in my car..
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
she made a facebook for her toddler.. his likes include lil wayne and ice luge. He has more friends than i do. I mean, Seriously? there's not enough booze in the world to make thanksgiveing bearable
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
ok. i'm ready for you to come back and test the structural integrity of this futon.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
You were a for sure 10. You put on a traffic cone to meet someone.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
He flipped a shopping cart in the back room and had to leave to make a jazz playlist. If we aren't in love then i don't know what love is.
Randomize
