I dont get chicks, its like they only care about themselves and money
sounds like you understand them just fine
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
Couple in the hotel room next to me keep fucking. When I hear her get close I call the room wait for them to stop and hang up. If I'm not getting any tonight then no one should.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
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