Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I'm on that like soy sauce on rice
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
Just shook hands with the bud light truck driver, thanked him for his service to our country
I threw all my money on the ground and said it was for homeless people and fell down the stairs
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
Randomize
