Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
The one night I bring a girl home you leave the footloose soundtrack playing.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
he said I could live with him because I'm cheaper than a dog and don't need a pet deposit. That and I don't piss on the carpet...
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
But I feel like studying my flashcards during a blowjob would be rude...
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Lol, perhaps. But the drinks are so cheap, the music is better, and the bartenders and bouncers all know my name. I can't abandon it, even if it is a gay bar, its still my Nirvana.
Randomize
