I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
WHEN JENDA BENDA THE DRAG QUEEN TELLS YOU TO RUN, YOU RUN, BITCH!!!
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Hey buddy, turns out those were the PB&shroomwiches, soooo you may want to reconsider dinner with your girlfriends family tonight...
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
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