So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP 😂😂😂😂
Randomize
