You smell like stripper and shame
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
Don't interrupt me, I have a limited time to be high and thus be remarkably good at Pac Man
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
cassie wtf are you alive??! no one has seen you for like seven hours whereeee did you go
IS IT POSSIBLE FOR A GUY TO NOT HAVE BALLS
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
Dude. The amount of love and appreciation from a house full of stoners when you come home at 4 am with donuts is overwhelming. The kind of love to make Jesus have to work a little harder at his unconditional love thing.
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I texted him "my vagina is pounding for you"
I know, you made me proof read it.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
Yeah. Broke it off. Saw her cheating after she forgot to turn her zoom off. Ring=$$$. Not making that mistake-priceless
Randomize
