plz talk dirty to me
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
This morning I proved to myself and all the kids on the playground that I can't puke and drive.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I'm basically your average "grandpa stuck in a 28 year old woman's body" - i'm super passionate about retirement and crossing on the walk signal.
and SLEEP god I love sleep
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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