she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Because the last time i saw or spoke to him he came all over me in a hammock.
And then I saw the naval officer and gave up that whole new leaf thing
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
It's the best! If I had one wish it would be for life to be one really long gay porno. Thats what I wish for during every 11:11.
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
I just wish the first erections of my life didn't take place at a dentists office but hey whatever I turned out alright
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
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