I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
wow... just woke up to find out that the OJ we used in my bong last night was poured back into the carton
Her sex list was a LOT longer than mine. She tried to justify it by saying '4 of those don't count because they were in the gang bang'.
I just took a bite of a bagel at school and it tasted like weed. If I am high for my test in 2 hours I'm gonna kick someones ass
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Are ropes allowed in during conjugals?
It was all good until his cat started licking my nipple along with him
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