we made a giant pot of alcholic jello. i filled a gallon bag and brought it to dorms. desk guy gave me weird looks, he doesnt realize this is how i will pass all of my room searches
After you puked you called ur mom and told her you fucked on her bed, then u said "Have a good night mommy!" hung up and passed out on my couch
that would explain 17missed calls and 3 very angry voicemails from her
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Just made a pepperoni sandwich with cheese, mayo, and pickles. Poverty is like pot, without the happy feeling.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I feel like someone was just looking at my memory and took out an eraser and was like "nope he doesnt need that"
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
"I'm 95% straight," he says. Cut to him on his knees...by far the most beautiful guy I've ever fucked.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
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