they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
Congratulations, your dick has been selected to participate in my birthday sex. Please reply with a response.
Do I have a choice?
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im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
If you loved me you'd bring cheese fries and a condom
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
How does it feel to date your dad?
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