No, don't worry. We're not going to get THAT arrested.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
So I'm about to drive his drunk ass home and he spits on my car. Before I can say, "Dude, what the fuck?!", he puts his finger to my lips and goes "shhh, its in the past."
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
So after my hot dog popped out of the bun and fell to the ground I tried to pick it back up and eat it. He had to kick it away from me to stop me from trying to pick it back up and eat it. I like him.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
there is another microwave in the elevator.
Randomize
