This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
By the end of the second bowl I was making sound effects to every hand movement he made.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
Would it be safe to assume you're the one that left my front door wide open and left yourself a trail of jaeger drops to find your way back?
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
I wonder how your parents would feel if the scarf they gave me for Christmas is mainly being used for a blindfold during sex...
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
Wore a burger king crown while giving head still drunk this morning #blessed
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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