Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
dude 8 am is too early to start pregaming for new years eve
clearly you are not from wisconsin
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
No joke. Last we saw of him he was naked and dragging that stupid goat into the bushes.
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
took over 12 bombs tonight and we still aren't hooking up. Wait how am I functioning
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
