she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
I've rolled joints bigger than that penis.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
no ping pong balls so we're playing beer pong with an ornament. you can't tell me that's not festive.
LSHMSFOAIDMT = laughing so hard my sombrero falls off and I drop my taco.
You had the genius idea to tape beer to the celing fan. There goes his security deposit. He is gonna be fuckin pissed.
Fuck Sunday funday. Fuck real pants. Fuck the sun. Fuck Jameson. Fuck my life. Yes, I am hungover as shit sitting in my office eating bacon.
For future reference "bring our litter sisters on our date day" is not such a good idea
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
No other way to put this but the dick was not worth him crying for an hour after. No more online hookups.
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
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