I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
Found out that no one else got Christmas bonuses...and you said nothing good could come from sleeping with my boss.
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
Got him to take a shot from the drip pan on the George Forman. He's gone now.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Stoner thoughts are the only thoughts I want to have now.
Randomize
