very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
It was like a mary poppins bag, except a sexual mary poppins bag.
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Cops came. Forced us to take the "Honk and We'll Drink" and the "Free Shots to Father's of Freshman Daughters" signs down. Before we did, someone honked and the cop said, "Aren't you gonna drink?" They then told us to move the party inside by ten.
My 16 year old neighbor is throwing a rager cuz her parents are out of town and my brother and I are sitting on the porch listening to A) someone fuck on the trampoline B) a girl bawling about her parents finding out C) someone puking in what we think is the hot tub. And overall we take a shot everytime someone says "bra"
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
He saved you from those guys at the club, took you home, and made you breakfast. If this isn't your come to Jesus moment IDK what is.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Someone broke into my car last night. Didn't take anything, even left the beer in my backseat. They need to get their priorities straight, obviously.
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
Randomize
