is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
I was so drunk. I apparently did a flip over the balcony using it as monkey bars. Ya I hurt a bit today
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
I still have way too many Frat houses to get blackout drunk at before I'm get in any type of relationship
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
And I'm still awake, and you left me. Like the guy on Jurassic Park, that jumped out of the car expecting me to save myself while there is a man eating T-rex ready to tear my ass apart except theres a mathematician and paleontologist there to save me because they are bad asses.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
I have to have sex on a bidet. I'm not sure what kind, but it's reason #4 for an Italian vacation!
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
Randomize