Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
You know you're hung over when your pose in art class is lying face down on the platform
I just woke up with a bunch of French fries in my hand and a chocolate shake balancing on my pillow. Lovely.
gross. I think i'll just donate all my eggs. My children will be incredible, but they're not welcome in my womb
i think i had a heart attack, prayed, and jizzed my pants.all at once.
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
UPDATE: IM NOT A TEEN MOM LETS GO PARTY
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Don't go to jail over some guy named Bunky
I'm a dude in a dress, who came to a party with Holly GoLightly, got hit on by Bambi's mom, and wants to do terrible things to Link. Halloween is weird
JUST DENIED A NEW YEARS KISS BECAUSE HE WAS A COWBOYS FAN.
Its really hard to get off when the googly eyes on your vibrator stare into your soul..
Randomize
