i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
who knew i was capable of sobriety and human-like emotions all in the same night?
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
THERE ARE LEGITLY 4 SEPARATE BITE MARKS ON MY DICK. WHAT. THE. FUCK.
Legitimately*
Go fuck yourself
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize