you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
Omg. I have a story to tell you later about that girl that just crawled on stage
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
Goddamn right, I may not survive the apocalypse, but my eyebrows fucking will.
I think my liver has finally had enough and is going all Ashley-Judd-in-a-Lifetime-movie on me.
I bought two pregnancy tests and a cosmopolitan magazine at 4am... I told the cashier "dont judge me, ur not God"
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
I refuse to take any type of advice let alone love advice from a motherfucker who is missing 3 fingers from a Fucked up masturbating accident.
Randomize
