dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I'm a terrible person. There are two guys speaking sign language on the metro platform and at first I thought they were drunk and doing a silly dance.
I told you not to have sex with her on my futon
I didnt dude, i swear!
either that or you were eating mayo, which was the second thing i told you not to do on my futon
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
Help me help you realize you are a moron
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
He fucked me harder than I've ever been fucked before and afterwards he started crying and profusely apologizing to god and baby Jesus for his sin.
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