if he's not good at sex i should be allowed to have sex with someone who is. that's a totally legit statement i think
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I was pissing in the urinal at the concert and some drunk chick ran in and yelled 'but the lines to fucking long' then ran out with 10 state troopers chasing her... Yeah
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Randomize
