I think scott just propositioned me for sex
he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Hey bro, did you ever hear from the background investigator that i was supposed to bang?
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
You peed on someone's house because they had a Wisconsin flag.
Bitch guess who just got a fucking taser
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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