ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
Give me a reason to not spend the rest of my evening high watching dogs 101 videos
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
We were gonna go out drinking tonight but she found out she's pregnant so are you free
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
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