He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
Just got a free shot w my beer...it's not quite 11am yet...I love international travel. These people aren't judgmental.
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
I've been asked to reupholster their slam-couch so I found some off-cuts of medical-grade, hermetically sealed fabric. She'll be slammed upon for generations to come.
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
11:30 you texted me saying he was on his way. 11:37 you said, "Oh my God that was terrible."
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Everyone got an underage but her
How'd she get out of it?!
She hid in the FUCKING DRYER
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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