i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
So my professor just changed my Final to 7:45am on May 6th. Shouldn't a Spanish professor understand the implications of Cinco de Mayo???
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
There is no way to say this. Dude, I peed your bed. No questions, no answers. My flight leaves in 30 minutes. Use my detergent. Also, THE VODKA IN THE FRIDGE IS YOURS.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
