Is showing up wearing the condom a bit presumptus
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
sorry for the naked aussie man in your room last night, he got lost on his way to the bathroom
In honor of Sarah Palin's bday I suggest we watch Nailing Palin
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
raging hangover at work with a lunchable dreaming of the sex ill never have. my life is perfect.
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize